Why have I not posted in such a long time? I'd like to pretend such questions are rhetoric - a minor turbulence in the road of high school academic success. I even pretend that this blog is something I can turn my back to and permanently forsake - yet, I always come running back to its dusty domain.
I have a physics test on monday. And I am insecure. Trembling also, despite being located on a chair. I should be studying, one may postulate - but I've covered all of the material, and know all formulae by heart. Once again, I am captured by a more deeply rooted perturbation. That of being insufficient.
Unlovable almost. Hell, insufficient is only a euphemism when compared to the lolling thoughts patrolling my mind. I am facing an ever-demanding society - and I am scant. Not clad, but skepticsm-associated paltry. Take back the first sentence of the paragraph - I am unlovable.
I make a fool of myself at every chance I am given to talk. Like an army of demeanoured vengeance maniacs, the thorns that surround my path to glee grow prickled on my skin - picking on every imperfection, every thing that makes me human. Mutilated, annihilated - torn! - my only shroud is lifted off my frail remaining physique, marking me bare and vulnerable.
A quick look at the mirror further validates the point presented above - I am shunned here. Shunned by friends, family, fellows and foes alike. Unlovable. Don't be brainwashed by what cosmetic-selling corporate companies tell you - irresonant exclamations of " everyone being beautiful" - because, here lies a person who is nothing but a messed up bundle of thorns. And it's all society's fault.
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